My darling Les, I don't know where to begin really.  I went away on my own last month - the first time since losing you.  I managed really well - and everything about the holiday was good.  Then I had a bit of a stumble resulting in a broken bone in my foot and a sprain as well.  Folks were all really kind to me and I had no shortage of volunteers to push the wheelchair.  Since coming home things have been more difficult.  I can't drive so shopping, and going out generally, is reliant on my being able to get lifts.  I had to resort to taxis when Bertie was groomed, so that was a very expensive haircut!  Although the fracture is healing and I am managing on just one crutch, much of my independence has been lost, albeit temporarily.  I am able to take Bertie for short walks now though - much to his delight.  To further complicate matters, I have been sent a date for my hand surgery - next Thursday!  So I need to be able to walk without a crutch by then.  I also need to sort out a lift to the hospital and am really wishing it can be a family member who can have time off to take me but this may not be possible for all sorts of very good reasons.  All of this messiness is beginning to wear me down now.  Nothing would have been an issue if you were here.  You always had that happy knack of making everything ok - or at least seem less problematic or difficult.  I love you so much and miss you every single day.  Forgive me for sounding so whiney, it's just that on this particular day everything is always that much more difficult.  I know that you would want me to live my life and be happy, and, truly, I do manage this most of the time.  But sometimes I still feel your loss so very acutely and just find things so difficult without you, my lovely, loving man.  Oh yes, I discovered a leak in the airing cupboard this morning.  I have had a plumber in to sort that but will need to contact the insurance people about the carpet - job for tomorrow's list.
Well, Les, better go and get food ready for the cat, the dog and myself - see, I know my place in the pecking order 😂.  Sure I'll feel better tomorrow. Love you always xxxx